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THE KIWI LAMENT -
WHERE IS OUR NATIONAL FLAG?
Untrustworthy Poms Abscond From
PACRIM 2000 With New Zealand Flag
The misadventures of the "kidnapped" New Zealand flag will almost certainly become a landsailor's version of the popular children's "Where's Wally" storybook. Below are the earlier excursions of the poor unfortunate New Zealand flag. What will become of it? What further mischief will befall the blessed wee ensign in the hands of these miscreants? Time will tell as its journeys unfold...
t o m e s s a g e o n e - M a y 1 1
t o m e s s a g e t w o - M a y 2 4
t o m e s s a g e t h r e e - J u n e 7
t o m e s s a g e f o u r - J u n e 28
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MESSAGE ONE
received MAY 11:The attached came to me (see "Sheik of New Zealand" photo on left at top of this webpage) in an email that was only partially received. Probably something to do with the latest bug that is surfing the net. It was passed to me by a reliable source, an investigative journalist who is, even as you read this, labouring long into the night to investigate all of the background to this story.
Once upon a time there was a Kiwi flag. Kiwi flag went on its holidays. It was taken to a far off place called Ivanpah. There it was put on a flag pole (the only sensible place for a flag to stay) where it was able to watch all sorts of strange things. Human beings on sail powered chariots rushing about all around it. Then, once they had finished rushing around on their chariots they rushed to a large tent, where they drank fluids from tin cans and became increasingly noisy. Then, after some days of this, they all gathered together and presented tokens to some of the charioteers, and they got even noisier that on previous evenings. Then they all went away. At some point in this Kiwi flag was kidnapped! Shock! Horror! How much is the ransom?
Nobody knows where Kiwi flag is at the moment but photographic evidence has emerged to show that Kiwi flag was spotted recently, adorning the head of the Sheik of New Zealand who, at the time, was digging for oil on the beach at Hoylake in England! [A photograph is attached] Gosh! How did Kiwi flag get there? Where will it appear next?
No way of knowing what happened next as the email transmission broke down at that point. If our intrepid reporter comes up with any more news or photos you will be the first to hear about it.
Chris Wright K508
t o m e s s a g e t w o M a y 2 4 . . .
MESSAGE TWO received MAY 24:
In the words of what used to be, well in some places at least, a popular song, "Mad Dogs and Englishmen go out in the midday sun..."
Then who is this hairy fellow? (see photo on right at top of this webpage)Clearly not an Englishman as he seems to be trying a French yacht for size.
But wait a minute... why is he so strangely attired? Is that a flag he is wearing? Could this be a new sighting (on the east coast of England) of the missing Kiwi flag? If so, doesn't it get around? Holiday at Ivanpah one week, digging for oil near Liverpool soon afterwards, and now adorning a hairy mutt much further east. Where next, we wonder?
Chris Wright K508
t o m e s s a g e t h r e e M a y 2 4 . . .
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| Kiwi flag mysteriously appears atop of the Cefn Sidan lifeguard building. | Sleeping English pilot adorned in New Zealand regalia. |
MESSAGE THREE received JUNE 7:
That much travelled, missing Kiwi flag has been spotted again. Strutting his stuff with the lifeguard's pals and shading an Englishman out in the midday sun. (see above photos)He get's around, that's for sure. I hear tell that he's had a trip abroad recently too. I've asked him for a copy of his holiday photos to send to you.
Chris Wright K508
t o m e s s a g e f o u r M a y 2 4 . . .
Could this be somewhere in the Middle East?
It looks as if the New Zealand national flag has now fallen into the hands
of some Arabian flag collectors or is it another British ruse.
MESSAGE FOUR received JUNE 28:
That well travelled Kiwi flag has sent me his holiday snaps. Seems he's been a bit further afield this time. Here he is out with some friends near some landyachts. And as for his other picture, I understand that he couldn't make much progress chatting up the banner as he didn't speak her language (nor she his) so had to go and drink in the bar on his own. Shame!
Chris Wright K508
b a c k t o t h e t o p o f t h e p a g e
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